4 Magical Memories

One of the things that Disney is known for is making magic for its Guests every single day. Whether it be a free cupcake for a special Princess or introducing a Make a Wish family to their child's favorite character, we're always supposed to be making magic.
However, there are times when it's the other way around. Even if they don't realize it, there are some Guests out there who have made our days much more magical. It's those magical Guests who inspire us to keep going, it's those Guests we talk about years later, after we've retired.
And it's these special Guests I'm going to be talking about today. This post is dedicated to those special Guests who made my day awesome, directly or indirectly.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

4. Hugs, Hugs, Hugs

Now, it probably goes without saying, but Character Attendants don't get a lot of hugs. The hugs are all for the Characters. But for some reason, on this way, that changed quite a bit.
One day, I was Attending for Buzz Lightyear in Tomorrowland. For whatever reason, kids tend to go the wrong way when they finish meeting him, and so I always have to get down on my knees and direct them out the exit. The little boy I was directing on this day heard me calling to him and saw me kneeling on the ground. Next thing I know, he walks over and gives me a big hug.
I almost cried. He was so sweet, then he let go and went with his parents.
Granted, this could have totally been a fluke. But for some reason, this happened twice more with two other kids - another little boy, and one little girl. Every time, I would get down on their level to direct them, and every time, I would get a big hug.

It was awesome.


3. Marriage Proposal

Also goes without saying: Marriage proposals happen a lot at Disney. Sadly, though, I only got to witness one during my time there. The proposal I got to witness was when I was Attending Mickey and Minnie during their brief stay in Tomorrowland. I was at the end of the queue, keeping an eye on things, when a man came over to talk to me. He whispered to me that when he and his girlfriend got up to the Mice, he was going to ask her to marry her - could I just let the photographer know so he could be ready? I nodded, and after he left, I spread the word to the other Attendants, the Photographer, the Characters, and our Captain. We were able to get them some Just Engaged buttons, and by the time they actually got up there, we were all so excited we almost exploded. We all watched him (very nervously) get down on one knee and pull out...bride and groom mouse ears. It took her a moment to figure out what was going on...

But then, she said yes.


2. Make-A-Wish

Make-A-Wish families come to Walt Disney World all of the time. They come and go so frequently that after a while, as sad as this is, they all blend together.
However, I remember very clearly my first one ever. I was Attending Chip and Dale, and things were Business As Usual. I then saw the Make a Wish family headed my way. I asked them if they wanted to see Chip and Dale, and they said yes. I then redirected Chip and Dale's attention to them. (Before you ask: Yes, all Make a Wish families get front of line priority...for reasons that should be obvious).
Chip and Dale were so sweet. The child in question could barely move, but they both came over and gave him as much love as they possibly could. They also gave big hugs to the parents and the sister, making things as magical as they could. Then, we all noticed something. The boy was making puckering motions with his lips. I didn't understand it, but then his mother started tearing up and said, "He's blowing them kisses." I almost lost it, but I managed to keep it together and take a bunch of pictures for them.

It was absolutely magical.


1. Name Tag Girl

This is my number one story I like telling people. I sadly cannot remember the name of the girl involved, so she will have to be Name Tag Girl. Oh well...
I was working in Town Square (where Pluto and Daisy can usually be found). I was going along and chatting with the lines, trying to make the long wait more bearable. Along the way, a little girl caught sight of my pin lanyard and asked if she could see them. Of course, I got down and showed her my pins. She was oohing and aahing over all of them. Then, she caught sight of my name tag. She went crazy over it, pointing at the name tag and looking at her mother, saying "She has a name tag! That's so cool! I want a name tag!" I then told her about the Celebration buttons - these say things like First Visit and Happy Birthday and all that. As we were right next to City Hall (Guest Relations), I told her that if she wanted one, she could go over there and ask them to write her name on a button. Her mother then took the girl to City Hall while her father held their place in line. I went off to check on the rest of the lines.
By the time I got back, they had returned. When I walked by, the girl waved excitedly at me. "Look, look!" she said, pointing at her button. "Now I have a name tag! Now I'm just like you!" Her mother then asked me if I would take a picture with her.

Of course, I said yes.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

You know you love the magic.

AGENT R IS OUT. PEACE.

My Not So Favorite Things

In my last post, I highlighted all of my favorite things at Disney. After all, I have to spread a little magic (and give you guys some perspective).

But a few of you (and you know who you are) want to know what my least favorite things about the Disney parks are. That is, not everything at Disney is perfect. Surprise.

Using the same categories as before (Ride, Show, Parade, Fireworks, Restaurant, Store, Character Location, and Mousellaneous), here are the things that I prefer to skip when I visit the parks.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

RIDE: Tomorrowland Speedway

This piece of shit is the biggest waste of time, ever. The premise behind it is...you drive a "car" around a "racetrack."

Ooh! Look at me! I'm driving super slow and making your blood pressure rise!

How slow? 7 mph. That's right, you're going around this track at a whopping 7 mph. And that's assuming the driver in front of you is moving...at all. So, it's basically a ride version of your morning commute to work, except most of the drivers are children.

I don't care if you're six. Fuck you.

It takes forever to get around the track...but first, you have to get to the bloody ride...it's normally at least a 45 minute wait, if not an hour or more. And there are a few spots of shade, but other than that, you're standing in the sun. Which, it's still 90+ degrees in the shade, so does it really even matter? You're still going to broil alive.

And no, there is no FastPass for this ride. So you're stuck waiting the hour as you curse your child for wanting to learn how to drive early.

SHOW: It's Tough to Be a Bug

I'm not a fan of 3D movies. Let's just get that out of the way. (They hurt my eyes, before you accuse me of being a chicken. I really like MuppetVision 3D and Mickey's Philharmagic, but lord, do I pay for it afterwards.) This particular show, however, is the worst one I have ever seen (that's still in existence). Based on the movie A Bug's Life, Flik takes us through the world of bugs and tells us why bugs aren't so scary after all. (Yes, keep telling my arachnophobia that...)

It's also in the Tree of Life, so unfortunately it draws a lot more people than it should.

When you first enter the actual theater, it seems innocent enough. It's lit, people are chatting and happy, and the screen is covered with pretty butterflies.

But then, you start to notice a smell. A faint, acrid smell that reminds you of poop and gasoline...or maybe your brother's socks after football practice.
Well, if you had paid attention to the posters, you would have been warned...

Yeah...part way through the show, you get sprayed with stinkbug funk. And the smell doesn't entirely go away in between shows...I feel sorry for the ones who come to the last show of the day.

Then, after Flik tries to convince us that spraying us wasn't a bad thing... enter Hopper, who somehow (spoiler alert) survived being swallowed by a bird.

ZOMBIE!

Hopper then proceeds to solidify your child's (and my) nightmares for the next few years. He throws out hornets at you. And you get stung. I'm not getting...they fucking sting you.

Not real hornets! Geez, you people are sick.

After that, Flik is just like "...get out, don't squish us." And I'm like... "I AM OUT OF HERE."

PARADE: Main Street Electrical Parade

The only good thing about this parade is the fact that Elliot (Pete's Dragon) is in it. He does a magic trick and confuses Guests of all ages that aren't me or Sprinkles.

Other than that, this parade annoys the hell out of me. It's not just the fact that it blocks all of Main Street with its crowds of curious people so you can't get through to anything on either side, or that it has some of the most annoying, repetitive music known to man. It just feels like it makes no sense.

What's the point? "Look at me, I'm sparkly?" Not exactly a great parade.

Here's the entire bloody thing if you care to listen.

Oh, god...the music...


FIREWORKS: None. All of the fireworks shows that they do are freaking awesome.

Illuminations: Reflections of Earth...

Wishes...

There are some on Fantasmic!...

And The Magic, The Memories, and You!, and Dream Along with Mickey...and they're all fantastic. Disney consistently gets its fireworks right.


RESTAURANT: Tangierine Café

This is a quick service restaurant in Morocco in Epcot. Plain and simple, it's the only restaurant I've ever eaten at where I felt ill afterwards while at the Disney parks. I can hear the naysayers going but that was just a one time thing! Sure, maybe, but now that I'm a bit older and know what food I like, I can honestly say that I don't really want to eat here again. I don't like stews, I don't like lentils, I don't like olives, I REALLY don't like onions, I'm not a fan of lots of sauce...I'm sure you can see the problem.

It's also not air conditioned. (Or, at least, the last time I stuck my head in, it was not)

And I don't know about you, but when it's summertime in Florida, I need to eat my lunch in a cool place.


STORE: Castle Couture

I'm sure the Disney execs will shoot me for this, but it's true. I do not like this store, not one bit.
If the name doesn't give it away, this is where you buy all of those expensive princess dresses that you see all the little girls wearing.

These will easily set you back a pretty penny. I looked around the internet and came up with a price of $65 for the Belle dress. I remember seeing a price of over $100 for one of them, though I can't remember which one it was. But why do I have such a grudge?
Besides the cheaply made/overpriced thing that Disney seems to love, there's the fact that children are the only ones allowed to come to the parks in costume (unless it's Halloween or Star Wars Weekend). I personally love dressing up in costumes, and I'd like to take it to Disney on just a regular day. But I'm not 7 years old or younger...so I can't.

And besides, those same pretty dresses are going to make your young princess broil alive...seriously, have you ever worn that much fabric in July?

Yeah, I'm bitter...I still don't like the place.


CHARACTER LOCATION: Pooh's Thotful Spot

In the Magic Kingdom, there is a place. A place where you can meet Winnie the Pooh and Tigger too. A place where the sun shines all day without rest.

This, my friends, is Pooh's Thotful Spot...in Hell.

There is a tiny bit of shade there in the early morning, but after that, the area is fully in the sun. As you can see by the first picture I posted up there, that's not an exaggeration - it is in the sun. And the wait, for whatever reason, always seems to be around 40 minutes or more. This is a great place to get sunburned and dehydrated, but it's not a great place to meet a character. It's just not.

MOUSELLANEOUS: Stitch's Great Escape

Aka. The inspiration for this whole article.

Stitch's Great Escape is a weird attraction. It's not a ride, and it's kind of a show, but not really...I took to calling it a multi-sensory attraction, because that's the closest I could get. Wikipedia calls it an Interactive Theatre, DisneyWorld.Disney.Go.com calls it a zany, madcap show and a multi-sensory experience. But it also says that it's "fun for everyone." Like Hell it is.

To give you an idea, this attraction used to be the ExtraTERRORestrial Alien Encounter, where everyone's favorite chest burster (yes, THAT Alien) had his way with Disney Guests. It was explicitly stated that it was not for younger children, but we already know that people don't like to read when they go to Disney. Thus, people complained, and it was replaced with Stitch. Because somehow that makes it all better.

Yeeeeeah....about that...

It uses a lot of the same technology and tricks as before...but with a few additions. For example, Stitch steals a guard's chili/onion dog, eats it, and promptly burps in your face. The smell stayed with me for a week.

Also, since it's now Stitch (and everyone is warm and fuzzy from the happy ending of the movie), there are now more young kids going on this than when it was Alien! And there are plenty of adults around who weren't expecting such an intense experience. Therefore, this attraction is actually traumatizing more people than its predecessor! Go Disney! Keep giving us nightmares!

I should probably also mention that you are strapped into a single seat (you can kind of see the seats in that last picture)...and you physically cannot get out. So, when your kid is freaking out and crying out for your help, you can't get to them. You're both stuck where you are.

Sweet dreams.

P.S. This might be me, but when Stitch is "jumping up and down" on my shoulders....it hurts, like a lot.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Oh, the negativity...that made me tired.

But at least you have a little more perspective. These are things I prefer to skip when I visit the parks, and yeah, I have experienced them all. But remember: These are my opinions. If you like Tangierine Café, then you can eat there. I'll be over at Yakitori House.

AGENT R IS OUT. PEACE.

My Favorite Disney Things

Young or old, everyone has a favorite thing from Disney, be it a show or a ride or what have you. I wanted to share my favorite thing...but I could not decide which Favorite Thing to show you! I have many favorite things!

So, I'm going to list my favorite things from a few categories: Ride, Show, Parade, Fireworks, Restaurant, Store, Character Location, and Mousellaneous. *ba dum pssh*

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

RIDE: Journey Into Imagination With Figment

I can hear the gasps of surprise now. Yes, I absolutely love my thrill rides. Yes, I like roller coasters and out of control elevators. But Journey Into Imagination With Figment is super special awesome. Yeah, it's slow and "for kids." But I'm a kid at heart, and I also value air conditioning. It also has one thing that those other rides do not have.

That guy.

That, my dears, is Figment. He's a purple dragon from your imagination. He loves to make mischief, but he also is very knowledgeable about the imagination. He encourages everyone to tap into theirs, by using every sense that they have and by changing their perspective. And he sings!

Follow the bouncing Figment! Then when you get off the ride, spend time in ImageWorks and have fun!

One little spark can light your fancy/your mind sees more than what your eyes see/one spark of light can make your fancy fly/there's more to sight than meets the eye! - Figment.


SHOW: Fantasmic!

I'll admit it, when I first started working for Disney, I never wanted to see this show. Whenever I would go to Disney's Hollywood Studios, I would see the long line for the show and think "...what on Earth are these people waiting for?" Then I would go on the Tower of Terror again. I finally saw it after being there for nearly five months when my mother came for a visit.
I finally figured out why people wait an hour for this thing. It is the best...

Bloody...

Show...

EVER.

Every major animated character from every major Disney animated feature is in this show in some way, whether through projection or actually up on the stage. Meg, Mushu, Rafiki, Maleficent, the Wicked Queen, Scar, Pocahontas...they're all there. The music is incredible, the message uplifting. And the effects will blow you away...sometimes quite literally.

So, when you see that big long line for Fantasmic!, just know...it is worth it.


PARADE: Move It, Shake It, Celebrate It Street Party

The only parade that actually takes place 3 times a day, you can find this one in the Magic Kingdom in the street in front of the castle. MiSiCi (my-sigh-kai) is a chance for you to dance with your favorite characters to some of the best music from your (or your parents) teenage years.

There are stiltwalkers. There's confetti and streamers. Mickey will generally blow you a kiss if you're by yourself (true story). Conga lines and shaking your tail feathers ensues. It's positively mad, and yet it's one of the most fun things you could ever do at Disney World. And everyone from the Big Cheese himself down to the Incredibles show up to celebrate. Keep your eyes peeled though - there may be a few surprises if you think outside the box!

FIREWORKS: Wishes Nighttime Spectacular

Starlight, star bright...first star I see tonight...I wish I may, I wish I might...have the wish I wish tonight...we'll make a wish, and do as dreamers do...and all our wishes...will come true...


God, I'm tearing up just typing the lyrics. As soon as the voice started singing them in my head...well, you get the picture.
Wishes is the fireworks show that takes place nightly at Magic Kingdom. It's about 12 minutes long, and it's about...well, wishes. About the good things that can come from them, and also the bad - as the villains get a chance to show what their wishes would look like. Needless to say, though, good triumphs in the end, and you're left a happy, crying mess as you sing along with that beautiful little voice.

Oh, wishes...wishes...
*blows nose*


RESTAURANT: Yakitori House

Yakitori House is the quick-service restaurant in the Japan pavilion in Epcot. This is where I had my first taste of teriyaki when I was little. I've loved it ever since.

It doesn't have a huge menu, but it has enough to make you happy. It's a very peaceful place, even when it's very crowded. You're of course welcome to sit at a table inside, but there's a wonderful garden outside where you can sit as well - with lanterns and waterfalls and beautiful plants.

It's a nice place to just sit and relax while you eat. No rush, no worry, just enjoy your steaming, delicious bowl of teriyaki and rice.


STORE: Mitsukoshi Merchandise Store

And once you're done eating, you can walk right across the way to Mitsukoshi, the coolest, nerdiest, most Japanophilic store EVER. There are all kinds of anime merchandise, recipe books, language guides, kimono, shoes, food...this store basically has everything you could ever want for making your home as Japanese as possible.

Sprinkles, we need to go shopping here when we get down there!


CHARACTER LOCATION: Phineas and Ferb's Play and Greet

Oh, come on - were you expecting me to pick a different one?

At Disney's Hollywood Studios, you can actually meet Phineas and Ferb - and they are absolutely adorable. You can't get a hug from Phineas or Ferb and still have a bad day. All the while, you can marvel at the meet and greet area - items from the show, such as the Floating Baby Head and Ducky Momo, make appearances. The music that plays the entire day, even when they aren't out? It's a radio station that plays nothing but Phineas and Ferb music - with characters from the show calling in and making requests. Three guesses what song Buford asks for. And that's not even the best part.
Does anyone remember the episode Lights, Candace, Action!? (If you don't: Phineas and Ferb directed a movie starring Candace - The Curse of the Princess Monster.)

In this episode, we meet acclaimed film producer, Cletus Filmore, who is running the production. Well, guess what? He's in Florida now!

(The guy in the yellow jacket)
He puts the "play" in "play and greet." He encourages us to dance, he leads call and response songs. ("AGLET!") He basically makes the 45+ minutes you're waiting in line much more fun. It's awesome.


MOUSELLANEOUS: The Magic of Disney Animation

Some of you may be calling CHEAT, since part of this is a show. But the show isn't the whole thing. In fact, it's just an appetizer. There is so much more to be done here.
First, let's talk about the show: Drawn to Animation.

You, the humble Guest, are taken on a journey through the process of creating a character - in this case, Mushu from Mulan. It's hilarious and nonsensical, it's educational and entertaining. Please don't be alarmed when Mushu shatters the fourth wall - that's just what he does. Oh, and air conditioning! Don't forget air conditioning.

After the show, you go out into the interactive area.

There are meet and greets with characters here. There's a quiz which tells you which Disney character you are (I'm Cinderella, apparently...). There are some booths where you can put your own voice in an animated cartoon.

And then...the Holy Grail...The Animation Academy.

This, my dears, is where you get to learn how to draw a Disney character. The class is 20 minutes long, and there are a whole range of characters you could learn to draw. I personally got to draw Ray the Firefly when I took it, but I've seen everyone from Mickey and Buzz Lightyear to Tigger and Rapunzel. So you never know who you'll be drawing. Sometimes, the artist won't tell you - you have to guess! Just be patient with yourself - most people there aren't professional artists, and yet you'll still walk away with a drawing you can be proud of.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

And those are my favorite things from Walt Disney World! Hurray!

AGENT R IS OUT. PEACE.